What's the most valuable lesson you've learned in life, and...

“Your boyfriend is a total perv, mommy.”

Two letters of transit signed by General De Gaulle … Stimpy, you eediot!

But Tess! I mean Betty! I mean Veronica! (I can never remember who is who) which ever one you are, I love you!

What was Easter day like for you as a child?

Shameless vixen! Trollop!

Sex! Lingerie! Knock knock jokes!

Every day is a good day to punch a Nazi! I mean MAGA! I mean the Comics Code Authority! (I can never remember who is who)

Why do men like BBW? What is the attraction?

Ironically, Wertham focused on stories about crime, singling out Batman and Robin for its gay subtext and Dick Tracy for its violence.

Dick! I heard about the lay-off. What's a square-jaw crime fighter doing these days to bring in the bling?

Yes, Tess, crime doesn't pay but apparently Rated-G horror does.

Why do men think all women are the same?

I hear you're a stunt-double now for Fred in Scooby-Doo.

Of all the layoffs, Torchy Todd and her gal pal, Tess Parker, were hit the hardest.

¡Explotando Dick por todos lados!

What are some questions obviously just asked for sexual gratification?

Perhaps now we can explore what being a “gal pal” really means.

Let's do what we always do, lay around half-naked while men make terrible jokes at our expense.

I've also been making ends meet ... By appearing in Tijuana splatter comics as Evil Gringo #2.

Why do heterosexual men like anal sex with women? I think it's because they secretly want to have anal sex with a man? What do you think?

Marijuana makes Jesus cry!

Before there was MAGA there was … the Comics Code Authority

Tess' boyfriend, Ed, now works as a Peter Lorre impersonator.

Why do I feel so tired all the time even after a good night’s sleep?

Torchy, we're unemployed … And no one is hiring scantily-clad wastrels these days.

Just you, me, in a vat of lime jello, pulling hair, calling each other names …

Torchy thinks: Maybe I could play a gangster's moll since apparently smoking is still seen as wholesome and American.

Yankees Considering Starts For Ben Rice At Catcher - MLB Trade Rumors

Speaking of which, poor Cleo Coco has ended up appearing in anti-vice pamphlets.

In 1954 complete bastard and censorship campaigner Fredric Wertham published a book for the stated goal of creating a moral panic around comic book's alleged impact on juvenile delinquency. Much like the House Committee on Un-American Activities' disastrous impact on the film industry, the Comics Code Authority (obey, puny humans) put many hardworking comic book characters out of work all because of one poorly written book called …

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Are there any queer Space Marine Legion in Warhammer 30k or 40k?

At least until the peyote kicks in ...

Make Nazis afraid again!

And I ended up moonlighting in Japanese porn, but the less said about that the better.

Why are men so attracted to big breasts?

After you lather me up with that strawberry hand lotion.

Times might be tough … But at least there's one thing we all agree on.

Remember, kids, masturbation will make you see the devil everywhere!

Why was Super Buu so afraid of having Fat Buu torn out and becoming Kid Buu if he was going to destroy the Earth even before his transformation?

Gadzooks! It's Torchy Todd slumming it in Yugoslavian science fiction! The shame!

Only zombies dig to rock and roll, daddy-O!